An " Unforgettable" Vacation
Check-in was painfully slow—our bags took another hour after I complained to someone who looked important. Meanwhile, a family, with 3 small kids, in our group got scammed at the front desk—booked two rooms, charged for four, paid $9,000, plus front desk guy forced him to pay $1,100 in cash. No receipt, just vibes.
Room: Upgraded to avoid mildew—joke’s on us, the stench was unbearable. Called the front desk, they “sent someone.” They didn’t. After four days, we turned off the AC and got an army of ants instead. Housekeeping finally made the room smell fresh—so fresh a cockroach came out to say hello.
Food: First lunch came with a side of explosive diarrhea. The seafood selection was tragic, and a calamari-only paella felt like a crime. Burgers were great. Buffet was mediocre.
Beach: A 30-foot-wide swimming area surrounded by tour boats, i counted 83 boats, leaking fuel. Came out with a rash; my sister smelled like gasoline.
Resort: Nice grounds—except for the missing few pavers and suffocating exhaust fumes in the lobby one night Elevators went MIA the next night.
Pool: Decent, but no swim-up bar. Drinks were hit or miss, and the beer sucked.
Shopping: $40 sunscreen. Enough said.